i really feel sad after calling.
i shouldn't call them? or i should call them earlier? or i don't treat them good enough? my prob? my attitude? or they never really take me as their friend? idk.i really don't understand.
i was really sad they go out together without me. is this a friends made up from? before this, i saw them in JJ, I don't have much feeling cause i also going with Onie without them.
but this time is very very difference because some of them have to leave - for college and matrix. I think i have the right to see them the last time before we really busy on our studies. plus, the one who's going to matrix is my so-called husband! its really sucks. I rather dont know they are going than i know it now. its really downcast.
this is the friend that i mean for? friends??!! shit.
what is the meaning of friend now?i don't really understand.
getting so damn disappointed.
feels like going form6 is useless.
i want to get to new places asap.I'm no longer stand this kind of place where i feel sad with my friends. i hope i receive offer letter from Utar asap. please god.
couldn't resist to this kind of places. *sad*

Yesterday went parade with Eric, he talks alot of things which inspires me a little.
once he told me,
IF one heart consist of 4 chamber, what do you wish to fill in?
sadness or happiness?
there was too many things u have to care and think of.
thousand and millions of things.
human never failed to learn from mistake and past.
if 1/4 sadness and 4/4 happiness, he said he rather 4/4 happiness because
sad or happy the day will pass by.
why you want to waste your time for the sad one?
i said, idk. and i just smile. [=
i guess he understand what im thinking.
thanks to him alots. arrigatoo!!~

oh ya, JW also inspire me alots.
i chat with him the whole night, i found that we are same in thinking neither most of the aspect.lols
we always talk about love problem.
he say nobody will know what will happen in the future.
even how much u love each other now,human hearts - male or female will change.
changes of human heart including the way of thinking, behaving etc.
people will change the point of view when they are adapting in the new situations no matter where they are - new people, new surrounding, problems they might face soon or now, etc.
So when you're in a relationship, don't put so much of hope in.
its not that i ask u not to believe him or what, just don't fall into it too much.in other ways of telling don't so absorb into it.
its to prevent from much of disappointment when broking up.
BUT if you're still together over than fews year then its good. just let the time to prove it.
Prove it by actions, not words.
words can show it a second, but actions need the whole life. :DD
touching le? lols. [=

well, i think i shouldn't feel sad for them again.
its not worth it la..
cause they dont even take me as their so-called friends.
why should I?
well, its pay by how you treat me.
yea, im that catty. so what?
its abit bizarre, but this is the realities.
world realities is so mean ard.
and this is just the starting of it =p

*imissyou.
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